Full Circle

My week back at home...

The beautiful new ComedySportz Theatre. I can't wait to play here!

The beautiful new Jason Knauf. He's much less creepy than he looks. Ok. Slightly less.



John, Durbin and Erin are in love...with the new smoke-free Holiday Club!
Speaking of love...Josh and Brooke are in it!
Tracy, be cuter. I dare you. And congratulations, you two.

So I'm a little late, but as of last night, I have been back in town for one week. And thus ends my boating and blogging journey. I will likely begin a new, non-sea blog. But that's for another day. Let's get to the post-game...

What I learned from my sea-faring journey...

-There is such a thing as a 6-way marriage. I was honored to become Mrs. MastriFluMarHandWells, if only for 19 weeks.

-There is absolutely nothing Hispanic about Aruba.

-There are no days of the week. There are Embark Day, First Sea Day, Honduras Day, Guatemala Day, Belize Day, Cozumel Day, and Last Sea Day.

-Getting dressed is highly overrated and should be reserved for shows and restaurants. Specialty restaurants.

-It's never too early for bits.

-The ports are more beautiful the further you get from the ship.

-The crew bar is magical if you're not allowed to go.

-The crew bar is smokey if you are allowed to go.

-The only celebrities in existance are Paris Hilton, Britney Spears and George W Bush.

-People weren't designed to live on ships. If we were, we'd have been born without livers.

There is more. That's really just a random sampling. When people ask me, "How was the boat?" all I can really say is fun...crazy...unhealthy...quick...fascinating...and overall, floating high school. It was definitely something I'm glad I did and will always love being able to say, "This one time..."

Thank you, NCL, Second City, Shawn, Tab, James, Peter, and Katy.

My family.

Welcome Home

So now that I've bid farewell, it's time for some hellos...

Hello, Halsted bus!


Oooh...hello International Stinger hotties!

It's like Gillian is a weird statue and Josh and Stephen are trying to steal her. Is it just me?

I'm so confused to be back on the Playground stage.

And who the F is Rando??

Hey Rich Baker and Tim Ryder! At least one of these guys will remember this picture being taken.

T-Rydes and T-No rock out guitar hero. Tim will never look cooler than this.

Thanks for an awesome welcome home, Playground and C-Spo friends! You make Chicago feel a little warmer. (yeah, I know, guh-ross)

Spirit Farewell

So I'm finally back in Chicago. But I'm getting ahead of myself....


We sat front row for our final viewing of On Broadway. The only thing better than having such an amazing SC cast was having such an awesome Production cast. These guys were amazing.

Backstage for our final sketch show. Full of beans and full of bits. It was a good time.
Last day in Guatemala. We went on an amazing river tour to hot springs and caves.

Our final Beer Fest. Awww. I think I miss this the most. Or maybe Peter does.

Heeeeeey, hey baby (hoo! ha!) I wanna knoooow...will you be my girl...

Coconut water courtesy of Mr. Sancho's in Cozumel.

Peter, that is WAY too many glasses. Are you really going to drink all that? (Last breakfast in New Orleans at a delightful place called Petunia's...giantest omelets ever)

Flight cancelled...driving to Chicago...I couldn't be more delighted.

Sweet home Chicago.

Thank you, NCL Spirit. You were indeed my "home away from home" and I will miss you.

And we're back

Zoinkers...I'm back in Chicago. So while my boat friends are playing pool volleyball in the Caribbean Sea today, I'll be waiting for the Halsted bus in 8 degree weather. No hyperbole...8. At least I'll be waiting for the bus to go to an AUDITION. Yeah. I got a phone call from my agent literally moments after getting back into town. Nice.

So I'll be throwing some pictures on later today after the audish and after I see Meredith!!! Equally as exciting as a commercial audition. No, Meredith, for reals.

Home is nice, but I'm still getting used to it. Crazytown.

Thanks, Chicago Winter

I'm in New Orleans trying to figure out how to get home. Flight cancelled. Weeeee!

Details to come...just know I'll be late coming home, friends. Boo:(

Last...

Alright, so I’ve been absent from my blog lately, much to the disappointment of my faithful readers (you know who the six of you are). But I have good excuses, as well as good stories.

January 27 – New Orleans day, 3 weeks to go

We met James’ friends Tommy and Holly at Barely Legal, one of the classy Hustler strip clubs on Bourbon Street. We enjoy the dance stylings of the regular Sunday afternoon ladies, who are equally nonplussed and amused to be dancing for a bunch of comedians and a table full of creepy older dudes. Eventually James, Tommy, Holly, Shawn, and Katy head back to the ship, leaving Peter and I to chat with one of the dancers, who we’ve dubbed Rainbow Bright, as she was wearing thigh high rainbow socks and not much else. Full of curiosity and Malibu rum I inquire as to how one learns to do their brand of pole acrobatics…classes? Trial and error? Certainly you can’t learn all the moves on the job, that would be embarrassing! But I am assured by our new friend that most of it is on-the-job training and mentoring by more experienced dancers. I am impressed. These girls defy gravity (shout-out to Jenna) on those poles. Before I know it, R.B. is off to dance and Peter and I begin gathering ourselves to get back to the ship. I am just about to put my jacket on when Ms. Bright grabs my arm and says, “Come play on the pole!” Huh? I look around and sure enough, no one is onstage, the DJ is playing background music and the drunk older dudes at the only other occupied table in the club are absorbed in cigars and convo. Well, why not? Encouraged by Peter’s wild laughter, I follow R.B. up to the nearest pole (there are two onstage). Dressed in my jeans and a long-sleeved black shirt, I follow her instructions – grab the pole and spin. Now what many people may not know about these brass poles is that they aren’t stationary; they spin within their floor and ceiling mountings. So spinning…yeah, it’s pretty fast and I was soon dizzy and in awe of these girls’ senses of balance. I learn from R.B. that one of the most basic things they learn is to climb the pole, which takes a good amount of quad strength and friction. Try it, she suggests. But I protest, “I’m wearing jeans, I’ll slide right down.” “So take them off,” is her simple solution. Now, for a regular girl like me, the idea of taking pants off in a public place is a little crazy. On the other hand, when you’re onstage with a couple of brass poles talking to a mostly naked girl and being soundtracked by the giggles of a castmate, taking your pants off sounds like a totally reasonable thing to do. So off go my pink Sauconys and my jeans, and now in the long-sleeved shirt, cotton undies and socks, I’m giving the pole-climbing a go. It is hard! Those girls are much more athletic than I would’ve ever given them credit for. At this point, another girl working that afternoon sees the mentoring session going on and wants in…Sunday afternoons are slow for these ladies. She runs up and eagerly demonstrates a move or two for me to try from the second pole. I give a couple of good tries, mostly just ending up dizzy, much to Peter’s and my own amusement. After a few minutes I decide my pants have been off long enough for one afternoon and I thank the ladies for their career counseling. R.B. hugs me, pushing my face into her bare chest and exclaims, “You dance on Bourbon Street!” She really earned that fiver that found its way into her g-string on my way out. I should mention that while I was onstage the Smashing Pumpkins’ “1979” was my dance music. Apropos.

February 3 – New Orleans day, two weeks to go

MARDI GRAS!!! I couldn’t have expected this. I really loved Mardis Gras. Now, we only saw it just revving up, as we were there on a Sunday afternoon, but wow was it a party. We watched some parades and walked around until the realization was made…we don’t have drinks in our hands! This is madness. And so we stopped at one of the many fast food style drinks stands and purchased a hurricane, which is basically a grain alcohol slushie. Blech. But I finished my $9 cross between Wyler’s punch and Dimetapp because I was at Mardi Gras! Then it was off to the Old Opera House to enjoy the zydeco music, collect beads and take crazy pictures for the rest of the afternoon. All aboard time 4:30? What? We took full advantage of our passenger status and ran onto the ship at 4:35 to the amusement of the cool officers who are accustomed to us pushing it every week. Thank goodness they like us. Good guys.

February 10 – Last New Orleans day, Last Week, Last Hurrah

Yesterday was our final full day in New Orleans. We celebrated by getting our palms read (I’m supposed to have a good year!), eating beignets and jambalaya, drinking hand grenades (take that, hurricane) and listening to some more live music. I thought New York was tough on my health…oh man, did I not see New Orleans coming. So while my spiritual heart will miss this place, my physical one certainly will not. I loved Jackson Square and St. Louis Cathedral; I loved Mardi Gras; I loved the Chartres House, Café Beignet, and Café Amelie; I loved the delightful people at the Maritime Ministry for giving us such a nice place to bring our computers and send and receive mail; I loved how you can tell someone is from New Orleans by hearing them talk, but it’s not quite the southern accent of the rest of the region; I love that James and I shared a table with an old black couple and a middle-aged gay couple at Windows and they couldn’t have gotten along better, simply because they were all from New Orleans. Each Sunday that I went to mass at St. Louis I got a little misty when the cantor would welcome people who were still displaced because their home parish has “not yet reopened” since Katrina. The city is an amazing place and I hope to return to it someday soon.

So those are my last few weeks in New Orleans. I still owe a lot of pictures and of course updates from the non-US ports, but I’ll get there. This week will be a little crazy for me. My boat family has a few last hurrahs ahead of us.

On the Water Front

So what do you do when you're laying on a rented bed on a beach in Playa del Carmen, Mexico? Why you go on the internet of course. That's exaclty what's happening today. I am either industrious or lame. I'm choosing the latter and getting out of here. Just wanted to say hi.

Lost y La Playa

This week was fun. The end.

Jokes! I can prove that thesis statement with some photos. Sadly, I forgot to bring my camera cord to the delightful seafarer center so I could load more pics, but I'll share what I can...

So this week was more Lost, a trip to the Mexican mainland and some crazy times with some New Orleans music. Last week the band onboard destroyed our chances at having a good improv set when their ever so considerate fans drank and talked through our entire set. Needless to say, my attitude toward the bands coming on this week was less than hospitable. Oh how an accordian and a washboard can win my heart.

I feel the slightest sense of remorse for the disdain expressed in my last post. Truth is I don't hate Lost. I just want answers. My impatience takes hold from time to time and I say things I don't mean. Although I still can't explain how the writers from One Tree Hill got in on the tattoo episode. If you've seen it, you know what I mean.

Hey Tab and James, how do you feel about Lost?And you, Peter?Natalie? Come on, be honest.

So I'm not 100% sold on season 3, but it's getting better toward the end and I'm told it's worth my patience. Fine. I'll watch.

What could pull me away from Losting this week? Playa del Carmen, that's what! Ruben in his infinite benevolence allowed me to tag along on a trip to the Mexican mainland on Friday. Cozu-who? Yeah, I might be done with Cozumel for the remainder of my time. I was charmed by the PDC.

Gorgeous. Wtg, Mexico.
Oh boy, speaking of gorgeous...Ruben, Pedro and some tiny shorts. (learn more about Pedro at www.myspace.com/pedromadeira)
Love hurts, Katrina and Joe.
This is what real food looks like. It was preceded by hummus and beet juice. My body hated me later when I had to return to Raffles.
Q: Jenna, who fills your nails?

A: Wal-Mart!

Fun times, fun times. Today I'll be joining James and his boat guests on Bourbon Street for some Barely Legal fun. Yes, mom, you heard me.

Oh New Orleans...only a few more days with you....

Frustration (or Why I Hate Lost)

Call me a control freak…wait, don’t. That’s like saying, “Wow, you’re mom’s a real b-i-t-c-h.” It’s just not cool, even if it’s true (mom, if you’re reading this, I don’t mean you, I just mean moms in general…it’s a simile). So let me rephrase. I’m kind of a self-professed control freak. For this reason, I feel like I can never truly love a cliff-hanger show like the ABC smash hit Lost. For the past couple of weeks, and likely for the next couple of weeks, our life on this ship is Lost-centered. Days have been filled with dark hours in cabin 10601 curled up with green tea and the survivors of Oceanic flight 815. Season one, I’ll admit, blew me away. I enjoyed the rollercoaster ride of getting to know the characters, mentally penciling people onto the “good guy or bad guy” list, which inevitably became eraser-worn. So now that my mind-paper has become thin and torn, I am left with the daily journey onto Lost island, featuring burning anger at Others mingled with outrage at the indiscernible actions and decisions of the remaining survivors. All of this topped off by the knowing laughter of Peter at my obvious frustration (I’ll get you, Fluet) has put me in the weirdest mood possible, which really wasn’t necessary for my last 4 weeks on this ship. It’s weird enough to be facing the excitement/dread of ending my tour and returning to Chicago. Excitement = seeing Erin and all my friends, cooking my own food, going to my own gym, etc; dread = waiting for an express bus at 7:15am in the tail end of the freezing cold winter. But this is what we do, right? See something on the horizon and rather than logically planning for it, like a responsible adult, we hold onto to the greatest opposing force possible. What? Go back to work? I better sleep until noon every day I can until then…you know, make the transition as difficult as possible.

So where am I going with all this? Well…Lost has really gotten me to thinking about the parallels between their island and this ship, not the least of which was confirmed by James’ Freudian slip last week that followed a scene where something big happened on the island right when Sawyer and Kate were having a moment together.
James: “Oh man, it is impossible for anyone to have a private moment on this ship…I mean island.” (pause for laughter) “Wow.”
So true, James. So true. Katy laughed at me when I suggested the similarity. Ok, so aside from the occasional GI outbreak, our ship is blessedly free of life-threatening situations, polar bears and smoke monsters…to my knowledge. But we do have Code Bravo in the engine room, security adventures in the dancer hallway and more drama than can be dreamt up by JJ Abrams’ psyche. Our close quarters and 24 hour social access to one another forges bonds beyond that of a normal ensemble…and let’s be honest, that’s pretty comparable to the bond forged by having had another human being pull you out of burning fuselage and administer CPR.

We had the inevitable “who do you relate to on Lost” conversation last week, and as per usual, I saw mouths moving but wasn’t really listening to what my castmates were saying. So let me go ahead and answer that question for myself and for you, dear reader…(spoiler alert if you haven’t watched Lost)

Tabetha Wells – Jack Shepherd. Tabetha’s name isn’t quite as heavy handed as Jack’s, unless you’re a huge fan of puns, which I most certainly am. Come on, really? Shepherd? Nice work, JJ. I digress. Tabetha is our leader, our “doctor,” our fixer. She works for the good of her people. I can only hope that if I ever needed an improv leg amputated she would be willing to put me underneath a makeshift blade and be brave.

Shawn Handlon – Sawyer. I want to say this is because Shawn walks around shirtless and makes gross sexual comments. But only the latter is true. Shawn is our comic relief and our perspective-keeper. Any concern you could possibly have will be assuaged by Shawn’s sage, “It’ll be fine,” spoken with the gravity of someone who has been around the world and seen it all. In reality, he’s really just always ready to offer some patented “sarcasm and indifference” with no apologies. Sawyer doesn’t make excuses and neither does Shawn.

James Mastriaenni – Charlie. Sweet Baby James has the history of rock star at an incredulously young age. Don’t let his innocent face disarm you. He’s done some crazy things. But underneath it all he’s the greatest guy and a reliable friend. In the same way, you meet Charlie and think, oh cute, he plays guitar! And then bam…he’s all over some heroin. You don’t know whether to punch him or pat him on the head. I’ve done both to James.

Katy Marquardt – Kate. Similar name…coincidence? I admit, Katy’s not the badass fugitive that Kate is. But they do share that self-sufficient, every-woman quality that make the bad boys sit up and take notice. The main difference: Katy’s weapon of choice is the piano. Not as handy as a 9mm, but just as impressive.

Peter Fluet – Jin. He speaks Korean, understands more English than he lets on and sometimes he catches us fish. I guess he could also be a polar bear…have you seen him play pool volleyball? ZING.

Natalie Sullivan – Tough call. I’m annoyingly introspective like John Locke, a fixer like Jack, a smart-ass like Sawyer and a gossip like Hurley. If only I had Sayid’s hair. Dreeaaaamy.

In the end, much like the characters on “Lost island” we aboard the Spirit must create our own reality. We share space, time and supplies with each other…we know each other’s moods, thoughts, schedules, eating habits, strengths, weaknesses…and occasionally we do a sketch show and an improv set. It’s only a matter of time before the “others” of the NCL Production Company put us in cages for experiments.

But back to my title…why do I hate Lost? TV shouldn’t be this hard. If I wanted to put together pieces I’d buy a puzzle.

Photo Gallery

No energy for blogging again this week. Chalk it up to the GI outbreak (I escaped!) and the Lost (I am ensnared). But I have a couple of fun pictures to share, so please enjoy.

Crew party!
Pe-ter and Nat-lie. BFF! (Please read that in a sing-song voice) And speaking of friends....Bree, Nick and Joffee are 2gether 4ever.
James and Jenna rock out some Coca-Cola. It's a long walk back to deck 4.
April, be more photogenic, I DARE you.




Back to New Year's week....
Erin and I just went zip-lining and cave tubing. Thank you, Belize!

What happens when you're drunk on the deck on NYE and your room steward walks by. Arnold!!
Erin and a Coke bear. Adorbs!
The beginning of the end of my New Years. Hello 2008. I am not well.
Some people party. And then there's Greg.

Ship stats-

Weeks down: 14

Weeks to go: 5

TV series discovered: 2 (Lost and Ugly Betty)

Books started: 3

Books finished: 0

Subway trains ridden: a few

Caves tubed: 1

Ship wrecks snorkeled: 1

Blogs written: almost enough

Great in '08

I just like rhyming.

This week has been devoted to rest. The past few weeks what with the guests and holidays and shows and weather have been more than nuts, so this week we have holed up in 10601 and watched season one of Lost. James and I are brand new to the phenomenon and boy are we excited! It's a crazy show. I'm hooked, but I'm also super anxious to know how it all ends. What if it really doesn't have an ending?? Oh no! For now, I'm content to believe there are dinosaurs in the forest and that John Locke is a prophet, Grapes of Wrath style.

Well, boo. I tried to put up some pictures, but no dice. New Orleans it is. For now, I'll just say this week has been filled with great TV, awesome shows (our shows, that is), delightful passengers (can you believe it?), and general lower key, fun times. I'm starting to stress a little about going back to the real world in 5 weeks. Work, waking up early, putting up shows...how did I ever do it before? Now the thought of a mid-day improv rehearsal wears me out. Oh boy. What hath the Spirit wrought?

New Year's Rockin' Eve

Oh boy, 2008! This was by far the strangest cruise thus far. Not only for New Year's, drinking, the lack of Dick Clark or a countdown, or any other ship anomoly, but the weather was the worst ever. The ship rocked like crazy, people threw up everywhere, and worst of all Bier Fest was cancelled. WHAT??? Yes, dear reader, we went a week without it. Tears.

The good side of the strange..Erin was onboard! It was awesome to have my BFF with me to celebrate the New Year. I got to show him all the greatest hits of ship life, minus of course the festival of Bier. Oh well. I am pretty worn out from this week's activities, so I will post some pics and get on with my day....

Bourbon Street!
Fam-ly din-ner (clap clap clap clap clap clap)
Who's excited to see On Broadway?? This guy!!
Pre-party in 11667!
Code Oscar. We've gone overboard.

More to come next week. I'm exhausted. Happy New Year to all my friends everywhere!!

Happy New Year!

Really 2007? You're done? Wow. Crazy.

Happy New Year to everyone at home and otherwise. I'll be celebrating on the boat with my best friend, Erin. He's coming onboard today!! I may not blog for the rest of this week as a result. So to all I can't be with this year, I wish you a very happy 2008.

Wishing you Joy and Love from the Crescent City! This picture isn't great, but I only had my phone to take it.

It's a fast-food daquiri place. The same place is featured in the mall food court. God bless New Orleans.

Christmas Spirit

Not just a clever (?) blog title, but also the title of our Christmas production.

Oh boy! This is my Christmas morning face. I previewed it at our party the night of our Christmas show. It was technically Christmas morning.

I'm not saying Santa isn't real. But I am saying that's Peter under there. He's the best Santa on record.
This is the Spirit of Christmas family. Dad Shawn, Mom Tab, Annoying "Gangsta" Son James, and More Annoying Little Sister Natalie (Stickers and ponies and myspace.com!)
What a fun albeit crazy weird Christmas. Doing a show on Christmas Eve = odd. Doing a show on Christmas Day for the crew where the goal is swearing and drinking onstage as much as possible = awesome...?

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!!

Yule Blog

My Christmas gift to myself is that blog title.

Merry Christmas!!! I’m sitting in my current home, cabin 10601, enjoying some Christmas music and some Ghirardelli Peppermint Chocolate coffee (courtesy of World Market in New Orleans and the tiny coffee maker I took from the boys’ room). But how did I get here? Let’s review the last 48 hours or so of this Christmas cruise adventure….

December 23: A whirlwind of a day that ended with many a full shopping bag and still not every single thing I intended to get. Christmas, even at sea, is so much pressure! This week was exciting because I took the bus out to the Best Buy, World Market, B&N and to the Oakwood Mall. Oh boy, seeing the mall was even more exciting than seeing the Wal-Mart a few weeks back. Bath & Body Works alone was worth the trip. My Pumpkin Spice wallflower has made this a real holiday. Oh and I will add too that we began the day at the seafarer center, which is the best place ever. Global Ministries provides this place for crew members to use internet, make phone calls, send and receive mail and have treats! This week there were homemade Christmas things. Yes, please. Back on the ship, we attended our weekly family dinner featuring James’ parents. Tabetha’s fiancé Greg and his family came aboard as well. At midnight, we had a rehearsal for our Christmas show in the Stardust. Big Day.

December 24, Christmas Eve: Despite having gone to sleep around 3am, I wake up a little after 8 to eat and go to 9am mass in the Stardust. Yes, MASS! There is a priest onboard this week to celebrate masses. About 20 or so super-Catholics were in attendance for this morning mass. Msgr. Fitzgerald introduced himself and then asked us all where we were from, and he seemed to know everything about every diocese anyone was a part of. Impressive. Mass aboard a ship is comical (Kelly, Vinnie, Anthony, I wish you could’ve seen it). There was a table with a sleeve of hosts (in the style of Ritz crackers) and a bottle of wine and a bottle of Evian water. When the cruise staff girl came to open the wine before mass began, the priest asked her if he had to pay a corkage fee. Bits! After mass I talked a bit with the priest and then proceeded to the gym, where I realized that crowded ship + sea day = no machines for me. Fast forward to two full rehearsals for the Christmas show. They went fairly well and then it was nearly show time. After some scrambling for final Secret Santa arrangements, the cast was ready. It was odd and awesome to be doing a full show all together with the NCL company and all guest entertainers. Everyone is amazing and Ruben pulled us together in such a great way. First show could’ve been smoother…but was still good. We had a better audience (and a little more fun) in the second show. Just standing backstage with everyone and sharing our little rituals was so much fun. Although I learned that I hesitate before saying the improv standard of “Got your back” to a family of acrobats. Let’s be honest…I can’t catch any of them.

Post-show: party!! Ruben & Co once again come through and provide us with some awesome food and drinks. After more sugar overload, we pause the festivity for Midnight Mass to happen. Once again, it’s odd, but very nice. In my life I have only missed Midnight Mass once. I thought for sure this year would be twice. Thanks, NCL. Our party got rolling again once Mass ended. But we were all pretty exhausted. In an hour or so we wrapped up. Pictures of the evening were immediately put onto my computer. They will be shared this Friday, I hope. Peter makes an amazing Santa Claus.

Note on the Christmas show: I probably haven’t mentioned exactly what it is. Basically, they put all of the entertainers into one Christmas variety show, each of us doing whatever we do best. The singers and dancers (guess what) sang and danced to Christmas music, the tumbling family, Cameo Rascale, did some fun stuff like acrobatically putting a star on top of the Christmas tree, among other things, and Chantz, our resident musical wunderkind, sang and tapped. Second City wrote the throughline of a family reading The Night Before Christmas, leading into the music numbers. Tab and Shawn were mom and dad and James and I were the annoying young teen kids. Katy scored us of course…but what about Peter?? He was the best Santa Claus ever. Wait for the pictures!

Today, December 25, CHRISTMAS!! Here I sit, with half of my coffee gone, and The Christmas Song playing through my laptop speakers. I admit I’m a little misty. It’s not as though I have a home to think about missing. My parents have long since left my childhood residences. I may have even longed for Reno this year, but the only person left there is my sister and I’ve never seen her new home. This would’ve been my first Christmas in my new Chicago apartment, so all Christmas memories lie in the places that came before it (or on Michigan Ave or at Zoo Lights). So what is that I’m missing this year? Well…Erin, of course. He is in Wisconsin today, undoubtedly enjoying copious amounts of holiday fare and family. My parents are likely playing Santa to their residents, being family to those who have none. My sister might be working a very busy Keno counter (I don’t know if today is her usual day off or not) but only after opening presents with her husband and two young step-children. My aunts and uncles are spread out, my grandma is in Phoenix, where I spent a delightful Christmas two years ago, my closest friends are in Chicago, New York, LA and Florida, and my last several Christmases have been spent in different places each year. So the point of this long story is, I have no traditions. Well…except for music, food, and trees. But I can’t call any one locale my Christmas home. So this year, the Spirit is my home and the people are my family. And although I miss Erin, mom, dad, Amy and Meredith terribly, I am extremely lucky to have the people I have here.

In one hour, our Secret Santas will reveal themselves. We’ve had a lot of fun over the last week sneaking around and outsourcing our gift-giving to our cabin stewards and the production company so as not to be discovered. And as creative we’ve been, nothing compares to the lengths the production company went to for their SS operation. Those guys are nuts. Although I was incredibly proud of how I snuck a gift for my Secret Santee into James’ Ship n Males performance. There’s nothing like getting a jar of sprinkles from a guy in his underwear.

To close out this Yule Blog (yes!), here is the Night Before Christmas I wrote for my friends aboard the Spirit. It may not make sense to anyone else, but at least you’ll all know the names of my boat family….

‘Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Spirit
A party was starting but no one could hear it
Just beyond Windows, aft on deck five
In the crew bar the holiday was coming alive

And I in my boxers, retired to my quarters
Flipping past Larry King and Law & Order
Katie was equally ready for snoozing
Six months is a while to be freestyle cruising

Tab was with Greg, James with his folks
Bethany laughing at Shawn’s gross jokes
And then there was Peter, to everyone’s delight
Starting a new drawing that would take all night

When to our surprise, we heard our phones’ ringers
Who was it? Our friends, the NCL singers
Kwame and Nick, Jenna and Chantal
What reason could they have for this late night call?

“Ombres in the Stardust! Games of Taboo!
If only you could hang out with all of the crew
But the Gaswirth Mansion has an open door
You can’t get in trouble for being on deck 4”

We sprang out of bed and put on our pants
On the way down the hall we ran into Chantz
We told him about our plans for night capping
I don’t know if he heard over all of his tapping

As we continued down the starboard hall
We spied something shiny: Cameo Rascale!
Gayle jumped the broomstick, while we heard Steve sing
Nicole hoola-hooped then tossed James a fifth ring

Down the elevator, on deck four we landed
Wait, it’s not cool to show up empty handed
We need something to show our thanks to Nick
We needed some beer and we needed it quick

Off to the crew bar as fast as we could
“I don’t know, guys, I don’t think we should
Even with our heads down and our nametags on
We don’t have the freedom they do on the Dawn.”

Then in a moment, we all knew the answer
Let’s call on our escorts, the NCL dancers!
On Katrina, on Joe, on Ruben and Bree
Katherine and April, Topher and Bobby

With you we can venture without any fear
Hooray! We can have one dollar beer
We gathered some bottles and also some cans
And thanked Ruben, our real-life Superman

Off to the party we finally fly
And hope we haven’t missed much Family Guy
Into Nick’s room the lot of us barge
Good thing his place is ridiculously large

Our Christmas adventure has ended this way
It may seem like just another sea day
It may not be tradition, but it’s something near it
Merry Christmas to my family aboard the Spirit

Senor BLOG

YES!!! Pun intended!! We're at Senor Frog's in Cozumel and these pictures actually loaded. I love it.

This blog is dedicated to representing. Check it out. In Belize, there is a bar with a bunch of random sports team stuff. Below, you will see me claiming the Gator National Champion shirt.

This one below is for my friend Brooke. You apparently have family in Barbados.
This one is from Bar Harbor and is dedicated to the best harold team ever. Oh memories.
On a related note, Sean Kelly, this one is for you, courtesy of the Crescent City of New Orleans.

I love you all. These little things keep you with me.

I just had a really weak shot forced into my face by a crazy Mexican girl with a whistle. Thanks, Production Company.